6 Steps On How To Master Your Emotions And Positive Emotions
In this blog post, I’d like to share with how 6 steps on how to master your emotions and take charge of your life.
The way how you handle your emotions will affect directly the quality of your life you’re living.
Our emotions are what make us human beings, and without them we can even co-exist and feel each other.
Negative emotions are part of our life. Most of us don’t know how to cope those negative emotions when they kick in our chest.
Anger, sadness, depression, and others negative emotions can be really destructive if you don’t know how to approach them, and deal them.
You see it all comes down to your perception to those negative, dreadful emotions.
The problem is not your emotions that affect the way you feel; the true power lies on how you perceive them.
The constructive view of negative emotions is that they’re kind of call of action or warning signals that something must change in this moment.
Unfortunately, the first reflex when we feel down, or angry we tend to resist those emotions, and we see them as bad thing.
What you resist tend to persist. Rather rejecting those emotions, embrace them and see them as support tool to make a positive change in your life.
Tony Robbins is one of the persons that I look up to a lot, and he turned around my life, he talked about the principal of emotional mastery in his book Awaken the giant within.
Currently I’m reading it, and I thought why not share with you this process, because of its importance.
First, before dig in, I want to say that this step by step process is developed by Tony Robbins and full credit goes to him.
So, here are the 6 steps that will allow you to master your emotions and take charge of your life:
How to master your emotions?
Step1: Recognize and identify your emotions
One of the mistakes that many of us do when it comes to our negative feelings is we ignore them when they first appear.
The act of denying your emotions make them more intense and solid, because they will build up as time goes on, and developing rock-solid neural patterns.
So the key then is to recognize and identify your emotions. This will help mainly to break the pattern, and develop new empowering ones.
You need to have a clear picture on the problem so you can build a plain actionable plan to solve it if you want tangible results.
Start by questioning your emotions. Are you really sad? Depressed? Angry? Embarrassed? Keep asking them until you find the answer.
Keep remaining patience while asking your feelings. You may have an inaccurate answer in the beginning, but know by do so, and sticking with the process, your answer will come up easily and quickly with accurate precision.
Step2: Appreciate your emotions
Appreciation comes from a place where you welcome something to happen in your life.
If you want your emotions work for you need to welcome and embrace them.
Acknowledgement starts with you own perception. The key here is shift your look on how you perceive your emotions on a deep level.
So what is the new perception that I need to incorporate in my life?
Instead on fighting your fears, doubts, or any limiting emotion, see them as support or a warning signal that something needs to change.
Letting out this resistance with those type feelings, will higher your odds to take over them in the future, and be the boss of your emotions.
Further Readning: How to stay positive and happy all the time
Step3: Show curiosity on the message that your emotions are communicating to you
Appreciating your emotions is not enough. Most of the times we experience a mix of emotions, and in those situation it’s hard to know which the exact one.
This is why it is imperative to give yourself a bit of time and be curious to know more about the message that your feelings try to offer you in a given situation.
It’s like you need to insist on questioning your feelings consistently, and showing interest to know them by going deep in the process so you can extrapolate the message.
It’s the same thing with our relationship with other people. If you can want someone shows interest in you, you have to show back interest, and curiosity towards him.
One way you can really go deep with the process, and really learn from your emotions is making it practical.
My call to action is to go to a place that makes you feel comfortable, and ask yourself simple questions like:
- What is exactly I’m feeling right now?
- What triggers those feelings?
- What is the last place that I was in where I started to feel those emotions?
Come up with more questions. The more you dig deeper, the chances are very higher to get the answer.
One last key tip before we jump into the next step, is your need to raise your awareness if you want get accurate and precise answers.
The process might take a little bit longer, maybe you’ll need to repeat it more than once before you get your desirable answers.
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Step 4: Get confident
Being confident means simply that you certain to get over on your negative feelings, and direct them to the way where you want.
Having confidence will allow you handle your emotions immediately and effectively.
One great way that Tony Robbins shared in his book Awan the giant within is to think back into the situation where you experienced this emotion, and start piecing together any mental scenarios where you surmounted this feeling.
Because I believe we all experienced in a lot of moment in our lives where we felt not comfortable on own skin, and we succeeded at dealing with them, but the problem we forget how we did it.
By constant and rigorous rehearsing, you’ll know that the solution already is existing within you, and that’s could be powerful thing to catapult your overall confidence.
Step 5: Have certainty that you’ll handle your emotions
Certainty is what fuel your ability to be confident. The more certain you are the more confidence you’ll be, it’s an obvious statement.
Certainty can be developed through repetition. You need to know that our mind is lazy when it comes to storing information in it, and that relates to any skill you want to build.
Step6: taking action
This step is kind of the cornerstone of this whole emotional mastery process. Knowledge without action, is useless.
So, what you can do to fully take on this process, get the most out of it, and translate it into tangible results?
My philosophy on that is to build systems for the most recurring emotions.
If you feel like your undeserving, or life sucks, probably all you try to express is you’re ungrateful.
So what’s the step-by-step system that I can build and follow to turn this around?
You can list out things like:
- Say out loud what I’m feeling.
- Welcome this feeling and let it flow in your body.
- Take 5 deep breaths.
- And write down 3 things that you’re the most grateful of, and invoke positive emotions.
Write this process in a piece of paper or your mobile phone to carry it with you whenever you go.
Whenever you feel down, pull out your phone, and just follow the system.
You might wonder that is too much in the beginning. If you feel like is hard to go through the process, just start by one thing.
As you get familiar with the first step, add the next step. Remember consistency is the main goal, not the process itself.
Learning to master your emotions is key to live a good life. If you master your emotions, you’ll inevitably master your life.
Give the process a try. Make sure applying the steps if you want to get relevant and tangible results.
Always remember information not invested is wasted.
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